Dear Filia and Xelloss,
I heard that a new “All You Can Eat” restaurant
opened in your town. Is it true that their roast beef rivals that of Nio
Heron’s? I’ve gotta see for myself! Expect us in a day or two. Is it all
right if Gourry and I stay in your guestroom? That way we can visit and
see the children while we’re in town.
See ya!
Lina Inverse
Sorcery Genius and Bandit Hunter Extraordinaire
Filia set the letter down next to her
morning tea and smiled happily, “Ohh! How exciting!! We haven’t seen Lina
and Gourry since the wedding almost a year ago. It’ll be so nice to see
how they’re doing. We can start by having a nice tea and catching up on
everything that’s happened and then go out for a pleasant dinner, and come
home to talk about the old times. Too bad Zelgadis and Amelia won’t be
here, we could have a nice little reunion...” Filia’s face suddenly
darkened “If my children behave themselves, that is! Val!
Adrianna! Xavier!!” The children looked up from their books, happy for
any excuse for a break from the reading Filia had assigned them, to see
Filia enter the living room excitedly. “Aunt Lina and Uncle Gourry are
coming to visit!”
“Goodie!! Can I play with Uncle Gourry again?” Xavier jumped up from his seat spilling the homework all over the floor.
“Yes! Of, course! … If you finish that assignment.” Filia replied. Gourry was great with the kids and Filia was sure he’d make a wonderful father.
“Can Lina teach me the Dragon Slave yet?” Adrianna smiled mischievously.
“NO!” Filia exclaimed, “You know you’re forbidden to learn any greater black magics until you’re older!”
“So, I can learn it when I’m older? Is that a deal?” Adrianna asked, thinking how she’d be 10 minutes older in about, oh... 10 minutes.
“No. That depends on how well you behave and if your father and I think you’re ready, AND if Lina wants to teach you.”
“What, exactly, do I have to do to be ready?” Adrianna pressed.
“That” Filia smiled, “Is a secret!” She had been given a few lessons from Xelloss on how to handle her daughter. Don’t make ANY bargain that can be abused! And when dealing with a Mazoku, or half Mazoku for that matter, this meant any bargain at all.
Xavier looked up from picking up his books from the floor, “Why do we have to study the history of the Fire Dragon clan anyway. They’re gone.”
“Because they were a great and noble people.” Filia replied.
“Oh, and that’s why you resigned your position as a priestess, right before they got slaughtered because of their own stupidity in an attempt to hide their past wrongs?” Adrianna asked, smiling cheerfully.
“Adrianna!”
“What? Did I say something wrong? That IS what happened, isn’t it?”
Filia sighed, “All the better reason to study them so you can learn from their mistakes.”
“I don’t mean to interrupt this fascinating discussion.” which I’ve only heard about a dozen times before... Val smiled sarcastically, “ But do we actually have enough food for Aunt Lina and Uncle Gourry?”
“Mrs. Lina mentioned the new All-You-Can-Eat restaurant..” Filia considered this briefly and then sweatdropped.
“So first they’ll put the new restaurant out of business and then they’ll eat our whole house?” Val supplied.
“I’d better go shopping.” Filia sighed, wondering if she should stop past and warn the restaurant owners in advance. Then she thought of Lina’s wrath if they closed for the day and decided against it. “Jillas! Grabos! Keep an eye on the children for a bit.” Filia called into the workshop.
“Alright Boss! We’ll take good care of them for you!” Jilas’ head appeared in the workshop doorway, smiling reassuringly. Filia winced... At least Valgarv could take care of himself... as long as the twins didn’t cause too much trouble. Filia glanced back at her younger children’s innocent little faces decided she’d better make this shopping trip as quick as possible!
“Adrianna!! Xavier!! Can you come help me with these groceries?” Filia pulled a large wagon heaping with food up to her front door. “Adrianna?” She got no reply, but that wasn’t too unusual. It often took a while to locate her children when there were chores to be done. Adrianna has a second sense for when to be conveniently occupied elsewhere, Xavier was often too involved in his playing to notice the request first, and Val was reaching the age where it would take just long enough for him to respond that Filia would often have the task done before he arrived.
“Adrianna?? Xavier? Valteria???” Filia left the wagon at the door and walked inside hearing nothing but her own footsteps. “Jilas?? Grabos? Where IS everyone??” Worry began to creep into Filia’s mind at the unnatural silence. Her children could cause a lot of trouble at times, and the quieter they were, the more trouble they were usually plotting. But Jilas and Grabos at least should have responded by now!
Filia frantically searched the living room, the backyard and the workshop. “Val?? Adrianna?? Xavier????” She heard a sound of soft breathing from the kitchen and looked inside, only to be startled by a loud thump as something fell over, landing on her foot. “AAAAIIIIIIEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!” She hauled out her mace and whacked the offending object, sending it flying across the room..... only to see that it was Jilas, tied up, gagged and, until a moment ago, unconscious, as evidenced by the drool still hanging from his lower lip. Filia rushed into the room and grabbed hold of him shaking him frantically, “Jilas? What happened? Where are my CHILDREN???”
Jilas only moaned in reply, unable to say anything around his gag, but then Filia was startled by another sound behind her. She looked to see Grabos tied up as well, and groaning softly.
“Oh Cepheid! What has happened?” Filia hurriedly ungagged Jilas, who began babbling the moment his mouth was free.
"Can you ever forgive us, Boss? I'm such a failure!" he sobbed, in his normal, overly dramatic manner, "How could I fail Master Valgaav again!"
“My Children!!!! What happened????”
“I don’t know!!! The last thing I remember was finding that candy you left us, and then I got really sleepy, and I don’t know what happened next! I’m not worthy of serving you anymore! I can’t even keep the children safe for an hour! Ohhh.. I’ll find who did this and make the PAY for it! I’m coming, Master Valgarv!!!”
“Candy?” Filia looked up to see a very familiar crystal candy bowl. And
there was a note:
For Jilas and Grabos, my loyal servants, for working so diligently to
please their Boss.
-Filia Ul
Copt
“Oh, no..” Filia ran into the living room where she’d last seen her
children and picked up another bowl exactly like the first with a note:
For my darling grandchildren!
From Granny Zelas.
“XELLOSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Filia yelled at the top of her lungs as she
disappeared to find her ‘darling husband.’
“Ahem.... I think that’s more than enough, Xelloss.” The Beastmaster interrupted.
Xelloss pouted, “Well if you didn’t want the details of the Lina Inverse’s sex life, why did you tell me to check up on them again?”
At this, Zelas actually sweatdropped, “Never mind. Now down to business? Have you come up with any new strategies?”
Xelloss smiled and pulled out a table covered with complex looking scrolls and maps. “Well if we start by infiltrating here, and taking advantage of the King’s reliance on his royal council, and then we plant someone here to bring up that old feud over the hunting dogs we should be able to instigate a small war. Then we can take advantage of the confusion by...”
Xelloss blinked as a VERY irate Filia suddenly appeared beside him, “Why, hello Filia-chan. What brings you...”
“Xelloss!!!! The children...” Filia noticed the Beastmaster was looking at her curiously and grabbed her mace. She grabbed her husband, knocking over the table of battle plans I her haste, and dragged him behind her as she went to brandish Mace-sama several inched from the Beastmaster’s face, “WHERE. ARE. MY. CHILDREN???????”
Zelas eyes sharpened slightly but she showed no other sign of her concern. She looked at Filia over the mace in her face, and blew a cloud of smoke to swirl its way up around the dragon’s trademark weapon. “Your children? How should I know?”
“Filia-chan...” Xelloss gasped, “Do you mind loosening your grip just a little and then explaining what is wrong?”
Filia looked down and noticed that Xelloss was turning purple in more than just his hair and eyes. (Not that he really needs to breathe anyway, but he can turn purple if he wants to) She let go of her husband, dropping him in an undignified heap on the floor, and turned back to the Beastmaster, brandishing the notes she’d found in one hand and her mace in the other. “What have you done with my CHILDREN????” Filia was twitching like crazy, and the flames emanating from her were enough to scare even Zelas’ infamous Wolfpack into retreating to the far end of the room, whimpering.
“I haven’t done anything with your precious children. Now please sit down, and explain why you have interrupted my top secret planning session.” Zelas replied coolly.
“The children? Filia’s what’s happened? Where are they?” Xelloss, was unable to completely hide his concern as he stop up and looked at the notes in Filia’s hand.
“I don’t KNOOOOOWWW!!!” Filia wailed, “I went out shopping and when I got back there were gone... someone” Filia glared at the Mazoku lord smoking serenely before her, “kidnapped them. And they left these!” She shock the notes again and Xelloss was forced to take them from her so he could read them.
“’For my darling grandchildren! From Granny Zelas.’ Granny Zelas???” Xelloss looked at his master, his normal smirk struggling to cover up the worry on his face as the hundreds of years of denying any emotion reasserted themselves. “You never call yourself ‘Granny.’ Only the children do that..”
“Your children have been kidnapped? And someone has the audacity to use myname while doing it?” Zelas glances at the maps and such scattered across the floor, “Xelloss, I think our game of Risk ™ against Dynast will have to wait. We have more urgent matters on our hands.”