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Of Now and Yesterday
a Final Fantasy 8 Fanfiction by Majo-chan Notes: Same as chapter one. I own nothing. Muse is still having fun with this, strange... Much thanks for the reviews. *stops self from begging for more* Yeah...whatever.^_^ Chapter 2 ** "Do you know what day it is?" Selphie looked up from her lunch of salad and a ham sandwich. Quistis looked even more serious than usual from across the lunch table. Squall was still in line for food, having left the meeting later than the other two women. Being commander of the Garden came with certain privilages, but Selphie guessed that priority in the lunch line wasn't one of them. "Er...Tuesday?" She ventured, taking a sip of her orange juice after swallowing her mouthful. Quistis gave her a meaningful look and Selphie sighed. "Quisty, why are you bringing it up now? Squall's gonna be here any minute and he won't want to hear about this." Their commander still retained the ability, even after ten years, to be absolutely anal about things he can't afford to be anal about. He's mellowed out in other places...she and the others had done their best to support him after the incident...five years ago, today. It was gratifying to see that it had paid off, more or less. "Heyyyyyyyy! It's Quisty and Selfie!" The Commanders of the Gardens, and also most of the other cafeteria patrons, turned to see a spiky-haired blond instructor come toward them. Bounced, more like. Zell Dincht was radiating excitement as he set his tray down and plopped himself into a seat. "I haven't seen you guys in, like, FOREVER! What are you doing here?" "Top secret meetings, Zell." Squall said dryly from behind the martial artist, holding his own lunch tray. " Very top secret. That was my seat, you know?" "Sorry man, I'll pull up another one." Squall waved that off and indicated that Zell should keep his seat. The commander grabbed another one from a side table and seated himself. Zell took the opportunity to continue. "Hey, this calls for a party, man! Both Quisty and Selfie are here!" "Ooh! Party!" Selphie gushed. "It'll just be the thing!" Squall shot her a don't-even-think-about-it glare and she gulped. "Please?" "Maybe not something large, Selfie." Quistis soothed. "But a little get together? Just the four of us?" "Yeah! It's been forever since I saw the gals, man!" Zell nodded. They all looked beseeching at Squall. Squall stared back. "Just the four of us. Just a few hours, because we all have to get up early tomorrow." He finally agreed. ** He threw the few belongings he had into the beaten duffel bag. The gil he secured in an inside pocket, zipping it closed then locking it. There was enough to get him to either Northern Centra or Southern Esthar...he wasn't sure where he was headed for yet, just that he'll end up there somewhere over there sometime. Zone's unexpectedly low payment meant that he'll have to find someway to fund his return to the Galbadian continent. He absently nudged his sunglasses up, there weren't a lot of monsters that yielded good stuff on this continent. Unless he went into the Tomb of the Unknown King, where there were some interesting monsters...then again, that place was impossible to navigate, even WITH a map. He scratched his head, then decided against it. His former area of expertise was getting hopelessly lost. "Might as well head for Centra first." He muttered, hauling the bag up to his shoulders and picking up his weapon with his free hand. The long-barreled, high-powered Exeter...he was more comfortable with standard issue weapons of mass destruction, but had to admit that the trouble he went through to get the components for the gun was worth it. It had taken him nearly a year to get the items, another two to completely get used to the gun itself. But now he felt naked and vulnerable without it tucked away somewhere in the folds of his trenchcoat. Random junk was thrown away as he tried tidying up the cheap hotel room a bit before he left. "Keys, keys...where are the damn keys..." He fumbled around the dresser, then checked his pockets. An unfamiliar lump in his back pants pocket demanded to be checked out, so he pulled out the small package, wrapped in creased paper. He took one look at it and had to squish the urge to put it away again. "Why the hell not..." he murmured. "It IS an anniversary, after all." The papers were unfolded to reveal a few items wrapped within. Carefully, he picked up a gold engraved woman's locket on a delicate chain, gently depressing the catch so that the two oval halves opened to the photos inside. One half held an old, faded picture. The three people smiled at the camera, the man and woman grinning from ear to ear as the little girl waved enthusiastically. A moment of perfect happiness and peace captured in still. The other half held a more recent photo. It was still almost ten years old, but the colors didn't look so faded. A young man in black, standing with a young woman with a green shawl. The woman was smiling, one hand raised to push a lock of her hair out of her face. But the young man was glaring at the camera in silent defiance. He snapped the locket closed, shaking his head. Anniversary indeed. Without another glance at it, he set the locket back on top of the dogtags and wrapped everything back up, stuffing it in his back pocket again. He stood up, then hmphed. The keys to the room were on the bed, where he was just sitting. "So that's where the damn keys were..." *** Selphie had Zell help out on the way to Squall's rooms. Since Squall is the Commander, it made sense to have their reunion there, because his quarters are quite easily the largest quarters in Balamb Garden, except for maybe Cid's. The petite young woman was holding a trayful of snacks as Zell hauled assorted drinks. Quistis and Squall had been working all day and Selphie planned to surprise them with food and drinks to relax with. When she rang the bell though, it took a few minutes for Squall to answer. "Wh--Selphie? You're early." But he backed from the door to let them in. "I thought we agreed that it was just the four of us. What is all this food for?" He asked a bit dryly as the more energetic two of their little group pranced in. "The four of us, of course!" Selphie replied. "You and Quistis are such work-a-holics! You've gotte relax sometime! I've got some drinks here too. Soda, beer, wine...if you want warm stuff, I have Selphie's Special Cocoa mix!" She brandished the packets. "They're good for you!" Zell set the drinks down and gestured for Squall to sit down. "Just go along with it." He whispered to their slightly overwhelmed leader. "Selfie's been planning this since lunch." Raising his voice, he continued, " She even talked the cafeteria into preparing some hot dogs for take-out. See?" "Zell! Don't eat all the hot dogs!" Selphie was ready to continue her scolding but was distracted by the bell again. "That's Quisty!" Squall didn't know whether to smile or sigh as the hyperactive young woman skipped off to answer the door. He was dead tired, but he didn't want to begrudge Selphie of their party, or time together. Zell was right, it had been forever since they last had time to do things like this. "Squall." The tall, blonde woman nodded as she came in, looking tired but smiling. Zell also scurried to welcome her, and the former instructor laughed at his antics. "What's the occasion?" She teased as she sat down on newly-fluffed throw pillows. Zell served her some cookies. "There is no occasion, man! Ma always told me I'm supposta be nice toward ladies." The tatooed martial artist winked. "Selphieeeeeeeee! You got some of that hot cocoa ready?" "In a sec!" Selphie called from the kitchen. She emerged a moment later with steaming mugs. "One for each of you..." Quistis took a cup, then stopped and looked in surprise. "Like them? These are new cups! I got one for each of us!" Selphie handed cups full of cocoa to everyone. "Quisty got the one with the cute Queen on it...Zell's got the one with writing--that reads 'martial artist' by the way--and Squall's got the lion!" Selphie took her own cup, a mug with a kitten on it, grinning widely as everyone seemed to be examining their gift with fascination. Squall looked up from his cartoon-lion cup and raised an eyebrow at her, and she merely snickered and shrugged. "Thank you, Selphie." Quistis finally said, smiling. "This is a wonderful gift." "Yeah! This is really cool!" Selphie shuffled her feet in embarassment a little, before plopping herself down on the ground beside Quistis. "I hope so...see, I was gonna get you _meaningful_ gifts," She winked at that and they all laughed. "But I figure, this is cute, and I know we all drink waaaaaaaaaaay too much coffee than is good for us. If we use these mugs, then we'll see them everyday, and be reminded of each other and tonight." They all stared at her and she laughed nervously. "Sounds kinda lame now, that I say it out loud." "No!" Zell protested. "Not at all. Man, that's moving!" Quistis nodded. "Selphie, it's a wonderful thought." Squall remained silent, but it wasn't the cold, stand-offish silence that had them so worried, five years ago. It was a more comfortable, accepting silence. Selphie met his eyes and looked to make sure he wasn't angry or offended, and he looked back calmly, with a hint of a smile. Quistis held up her cup. "A toast." She called. Silence fell in the room. "To those loved and lost...friends gone but not forgotten." Selphie closed her eyes and recited a silent list, one that she knew by heart, each named etched painfully in her heart forever. Irvine. Rinoa. Edea. Laguna. Ward. Kiros. Nida. Countless people in Esthar, in Garden, when they first tried to oppose the new Sorceress. "To us, for surviving, for carrying on their memories." Quistis's voice was shaking, but only a little. "To the future." They all murmured their assent and drank their hot cocoa in the toast. Squall's expression was closing off, and Selphie knew that the speech had hit a soft spot. After the moment of silence, she decided to brighten things. up. "Come on, peoples! Don't be so doom-and-gloom! Why don't we take turns on the catching up? Zell, tell us what's going on in your classes, I heard the new cadets are quite a handful!" And so the little gathering continued on a more light-hearted note...at least until someone suggested kareoke. **** "Wheeeeeeew...." He huffed as he stepped onto the rocky barren lands of Western Centra. The sea breeze was cool against his skin but he knew that wouldn't last long once he started heading inland. Oh, well...he wasn't affected by the hot or cold enough for it to be a problem, even as wrapped up as he was. The area looked familiar and he turned around, squinting into the distance. Was that...a lighthouse? He nudged down his sunglasses to see better, though the sunlight made him wince. Oh, he remembered this place now. It took him about an hour on foot to reach the ruins of the lighthouse. Once he was close enough, he saw that the place was abandoned, but not quite ruined. When his polite knock went unanswered, he turned the knob and went in. The stone walls and floor felt extra chilly even compared to the cool outside and he shivered. So many phantoms seem to haunt this place, whispers of children's laughter echoed in the hollow rooms. There were reminders, here and there, of what this place once was: a few pieces of rotting wood that was once a bunk bed, broken toy cars and wood blocks, and headless dolls. He closed his eyes and remembered the one time he had been here. So many, many years ago. Memory floated up to the surface...a tall, elegant woman with long, black hair, radiating quiet love and warmth. Holding the hand of the little girl, carrying the baby boy in her other arm. The mental image was wavery, as if he had committed it to memory even as tears filled his eyes. After a moment, he shook his head. As tempting as the idea was, to take shelter here and rest up for his trek across Centra, and eventually into Esthar, he couldn't bring himself to stay here longer than absolutely necessary. Now that he thought about it, he wasn't even sure what made him come. What a waste of time. His mood got more foul as he left. Once out of sight of the ocean, the breeze died down and the air started getting warmer. Most people, if they had been heading for the other end of the continent on foot and wrapped up in black clothing, would've toppled over within the first half-hour from heat stroke. He just got a little warm and more cranky. To top off his increasingly bad mood, it seemed his ability to get hopelessly lost still worked once in awhile, and he found himself approaching an unfamiliar seaside. The sun was still high enough in the sky that he couldn't tell which side of the continent he was on, though it was positive he wasn't on either the western or eastern ones. So that left the northern and southern sides...He watched the waves slam against the high bluffs in all their frothing glory, but could see no islands anywhere in sight. Unless he was very, very far up north, where the smaller islands and inlets weren't visible from the northern coast, he's at the southern end of Centra. Sighing, he started walking again. If he followed the edge of the ocean, he should end up at a familiar beach _somewhere_... *** "Is that you, my Knight?" the feminine purr cut through the dark silence of early morning. The tall, muscular shadow at the edge of the door paused, then moved into view. The Sorceress looked up from beneath her long bangs, and smiled coyly at him. He felt sickened by the expression. He hadn't known the sorceress from before she became what she is now-- Evil. Twisted. Corrupted. As his rival loved to say, 'whatever'--but it never failed to make his stomach protest. "Yes." He gritted. Hyne, he hated it here. Hated having to ask. "Where are they?" "Who?" She asked innocently, sitting up in the large, opulent bed, the first light of the sun streaming through the tall windows to illuminate her beautiful face and figure. "Who could you possibly be concerned about, except for me, my Knight?" He fought the urge to sneer at her. "Ah, yes." Her serene, pretty face twisted with malice. "Your _friends_." She spat out. "What care do you have for them? You are my Knight, I am your Sorceress. That should be the only thing that you care about!" Maybe it was the stress of the past few years breaking, maybe it was the fact that he hadn't seen his friends in almost two months and he was sick with dread that she had already killed them without telling him. Maybe he was just too damn fed up with this whole Knight-Sorceress bullshit. Whatever it was, his temper got the better of him and he retorted before he thought too much. "I care a shitload more for them than I do for you, bitch! I have no fucking idea why you thought I would make a good Knight for you, but you're dead wrong. I'm sick and tired of you and I want out NOW!" The sorceress stared at the tip of the bladed weapon pointed at her, then her amber eyes--he didn't know what color they were before her transformation--rose to meet his. She smiled. "Go ahead." She said simply. "The first step you take outside this door will signal the doom of your precious _friends_." She sneered at the horrified and angry expression on his scarred face. That was her ace in the hole, besides simply killing him outright, which she could not do if she wanted to have a Knight, desirable or not, around. "If you do care so much for them, then it would be wise for you to not cross me." She warned, leaning back on her bed, licking her lips. "You are a most unsatisfactory knight, my dear...but since you are all I have, you will have to do." He gritted his teeth. His pride was bruised from the observation but he knew she was right. Yet he couldn't help but throw a barb right back at her. "What's the matter, my _dear_ sorceress?" He sneered. "Are all the _satisfactory_ knights all scared off by your putrid stink?" She stiffened and hissed at him, and he couldn't stop himself from digging deeper. "Didn't you know loads of Knight candidates? Yes, your precious _uncle_ and _brother_," He leered, the expression twisting his scar. "Too bad they can't stand the _thing_ you've become." She leapt out of the bed, snarling. He felt nails rake across his face as she swiped at him with fingers curled like claws. "You don't understand ANYTHING!" she screeched as she sent a wave of force crashing into his head, crushing his will with hers. He fought, as he always did. The connection between the Knight and the Sorceress was supposed to be one of mutual support, mutual benefit. He managed to make it a meaningless, bitter battle for dominance every single time. He always lost, but that wasn't the point. Before, he didn't even bother fighting, he even welcomed the enforced obedience...now he could claim that he had finally grown a true, honest-to-goodness, goddamned annoying backbone to stand up to Her powers. And damned if he wasn't proud of it. As his mind sank blissfully into unconsciousness, he thought he heard her enraged scream, then her cries. Always, she called for others. The one she truly wanted to be her Knight. Never him. Seifer Almasy was no one's Knight, and certainly no one's Pawn. *** Selphie dreamed. It was a quiet, happy dream that made her wake up with a smile. She was glad that it wasn't a nightmare about what happened years ago. Although most of them had managed to put things behind them, sometimes the vividness of one nightmare was enough to undo countless efforts of self-control. She knew Squall suffered the most from them, a part of him--the part that invariably blamed himself for every single thing that goes wrong--probably still felt lingering guilt. Selphie knew there was nothing any of them could have done to save the ones that had died. By the time the Ragnarok had gotten to the flame-engulfed Esthar, the presidential palace--where Laguna must've been--was already leveled. It was all rubble and debris, and mangled dead bodies. They had battled...but they had not battled wholeheartedly. They couldn't. And after Irvine and Rinoa fell, there was no choice but to flee. What if they had stood their ground? Selphie got out of bed and went to the window, where soft light was filtering through from Balamb Garden's propulsion drive. Would they have been able to beat back...the Sorceress? Not back then, for sure. It was different from the battle with Ultimecia. With Ultimecia, they had things to fight for--people they loved, places they wanted to return to--it made them unstoppable, deadly. Grim and determined, they had refused to bow to death and inevitable fate, and somehow emerged victorious against an enemy that most called invincible. But back then it was different...none of them were resolute, none of them were determined. They were all hopelessly confused and heartbroken, unable to figure out the why of what was going on. If they had stayed and attempted to battle to the death...then it really would've been the end for all of them. And without knowing the reason behind the new Sorceress's actions, they could not bring themselves to fight wholeheartedly, to kill for victory. And so they had lost terribly, paid a high price for their hesitation in lives. And there still was that question left unanswered. "Why, Sis?" Selphie asked the dark quiet of the night, knowing that she will get no answer. *** End chapter 2 |