A Slayers Fanfic by Majo-chan
Author's note: Finally! I finally get to a Lina/Gourry fanfic! I hope this will turn out well since I didn't originally plan it to be like this. Anyway, I'll shut up and get to writing it now!
" I love you, Lina."
With perfect calm, she replied, " No, you don't."
Gourry looked confused. " What?"
" I said, no, you don't."
" That's not right, Lina." He frowned. " You're not me, how would you know?"
" I know. I know because I hit you this morning and acted like I was in a REALLY bad mood. Then Amelia stuck her damned nose in this and made you apologize. Now you think you love me. But you don't. It's just that you're afraid."
Gourry looked confused and she didn't blame him. She was feeling a bit confusedherself. And angry. And sick and tired of everything. " Just leave me alone, Gourry. I don't love you." With that, she slammed the door in his face.
She is Lina Inverse. She is strong. She isn't afraid of anything. She will not break down...
" I'm so damn tired..." She whispered. " So damn tired of this mess..."
The war had started a year ago. Dragons and Demons, humans caught in the middle.
She was sick and tired of the Dragons and the demons and their petty little war. She was tired of being the hope of humanity. She was tired.
Maybe it was the lack of sleep. Heck, she didn't know why she was so worried.
Humanity can be damned to hell, for all she cared. Why did they all think she was going to save the world?
She loved him. Yes, she did. She wouldn't admit it out loud, no. Never.
But she knew. And he loved her. She knew that too. Why did he have to say it out loud? Why did he have to break up the silence?
Loving would get them nowhere. Lina Inverse knew that if anyone found out she loved someone, that someone would be doomed. Yes, doomed. Gourry would never survive being associated with the Enemy of All that Lives. Especially if he was her lover. No, that would never happen. She had enough of losing people that were important to her.
Humans love, and get hurt. But they never want to get hurt again. They learn and move on, always looking to the future. Yes, she had told Valgarv this. She had believed it too. She had to hurt him. Hurt him, and he'll never want to be hurt again. Hurt him, and he'll give up and move on. Hurt him...and hurt yourself.
When will you move on, Lina?
People were afraid of her. Not the usual fear she was used to getting when she was just the Bandit Killer. People feared her because of her reputation.
Now they feared her because she was there. And she could do things to them that was more terrible than death itself. Fear. They all feared her. They all feared this petite little girl with the red hair. Feared her chaos and her rage. Feared the total obliteration she can bring upon them.
Did they stop to think that she could be afraid?
" Onee-san.." She whispered. " onee-san, help me."
But her sister wasn't here. No, her sister was not here. Her sister was gone.
And the price? The mazoku who killed her paid a heavy penality indeed. No one messes with Lina Inverse, not even the Ruby-Eye himself.
But what did that get her?
Nothing.
Nothing at all...
Her vision was blurring with tears. She thought she was never going to cry again. The last time. She had promised. It was supposed to be the last time, when she knelt in front of her sister's grave. No more tears. Be strong. Make them pay.
Be strong? She was never strong...never strong at all. Humans weren't meant to be strong. They were meant to survive. To slip between the cracks of destruction.
Stong. What was strength anyway? She could destroy the world. She had the power.
But when Gourry gives her that look, she could feel her resolve crumble into dust.
No, she was not strong.
She wanted to run away. Far away, away from this painful place.
But you can't, a voice mocked her. You are the mighty Lina Inverse, the Enemy of All that Lives, the Chaos and Destruction Poster Girl, the Queen of Overkill.
You are Lina Inverse, and Lina Inverse never runs away.
Where do I put these feelings? Where do they go? They won't go away!
Damn. She needed to get out of here.
The doorknob. Where was it? She could barely see with all her tears blurring her vision. Ah, there it is...Damn thing won't turn. Ah, there...
Lina opened her door and tried to stumble out. But she stopped dead in her tracks. " Gourry..."
He smiled. " I thought about what you said, Lina." He said. " You were right about Amelia making me apologize. But I still love you and that was my own idea."
Speechless, she looked at him and fought the tears that came down. And lost.
She fought against her feelings with reason. And lost also.
She hated losing, but his eyes were so blue and comforting. There was warmth in those eyes , warmth she thought she had lost.
Maybe losing wasn't such a bad thing...
Why did she fight? She fought to protect that precious thing she had.
She fought so she could live her life. She fought to love.
Some battles she had to win...some battles it's better to lose.
" Gourry..." She choked. " I'm sorry."
End